Halloween Crime Story

Welcome once again to the Sheriff’s Dept. Blog. Thank you for taking the time to visit and I hope you all enjoy the story.

And now, on to our story based on actual facts however, the names and occupations of the people involved have been changed to protect their privacy.

Kimberly Carson was the literal definition of the term “quiet type.” Nobody was very surprised when after high school she announced she wanted to be a librarian. However, Kimberly had a Dr. Jeckle and Mr. Hyde personality. All she had to do to summon Mr. Hyde was…just add alcohol.
Belle on Wheels

It all started one night at a New Years Eve party. Kimberly and her husband, Dean, were ringing in the New Year with friends from Dean’s work. They all knew each other well from years of T-ball and soccer games with the kids, so the atmosphere was light hearted and friendly. Kimberly had never been much of a drinker but that night she discovered “hard lemonade” and it didn’t take long before she was having a great time. A really great time. She was having such a great time that she felt she needed to tell everyone at the party, what a great time she was having, in great detail.

Long after this became annoying to every one, but long before the clock struck midnight, Kimberly was out like a light in the guest bedroom. The next day, after the head ache went away, all she remembered of the party was what a really great time she had. This scene repeated itself more often as time went by but no one really paid much attention because Kimberly was…well…a lot of fun when she was drinking. The slightest humor set her musical laughter trailing on and on causing others to laugh as well.

One night at a Halloween party at her house, Kimberly was well on her way to having about five too many when the door bell rang again. Knowing it would be another porch full of trick or treating neighbor kids, she glided toward the front door in her witch costume. Throwing the door open wide she cried, “I’ll get you my pretties” in her best wicked witch of the west voice. But instead of little trolls and the like, she found herself staring into the humorless faces of two Sheriff’s Deputies who were on their seventh noise complaint call of the night.

Kimberly giggled and asked them where they bought their costumes. When this failed to get a laugh she said “Oh come on guys, relax, it’s Halloween.” At the same time she attempted to lean against the door jam but missed it completely and fell laughing in a heap at the Deputies feet. Dean came to the door and after greeting the Deputies said “She’s had a little too much tonight,” by way of apology and, “I’ll go put her to bed and we’ll keep the noise down.” This satisfied the Deputies but when they were half way back to their cars they heard a commotion on the porch and turned just in time to see Kimberly break away from Dean as he was helping her up. She grabbed a broom that was lying against the house and hopping astride it, she ran swaying down the street laughing maniacally and yelling “I’m off to see the Wizard!”

The Deputies looked at each other in disbelief, and fearing Kimberly might get hit by a car they ran after her, radioing dispatch that they were in foot pursuit of an HBD (has been drinking) female, 5’6″ approx. 120 pounds, dark clothing, long pointy nose, riding a broom stick.

Not really understanding how these things work and also running on adrenaline, Dean called 911 and told dispatch two cops were after his witch.

Kimberly ran to the Bradley’s house on the corner and made a quick dodge into the hedges and waited for the Deputies to pass by. The Bradley’s, busy with their own trick or treaters, paid no attention to what they thought was just another neighbor kid playing a joke on friends, until two things happened at the same time.

Their dog, Brittney, who happened to be a typical Corgi; a little ankle biter with a big attitude, ran off the porch and into the hedge to drag the intruder back to her lair for later consumption. This was harmless enough until two Sheriff’s Deputies; or at least two people dressed like Deputies, came tearing around the corner and across their lawn. One of them yelled to them “Where’d the witch go?” A little frightened and not quite understanding the Deputy’s meaning, Mr. Bradley, stepped away from Mrs. Bradley as if to say “She’s all yours, come and get her.” Mrs. Bradley; missing all of this out of concern for her little Brittney, watched in astonishment as a witch riding a broomstick jumped out of her hedges carrying Brittney off with her and yelling “I’ll get you and your little dog two, EEE HEE HEEE HEEEE!”

Just as Dispatch was hanging up from Dean’s call and trying to radio units in the area that two suspects dressed as law enforcement were chasing a victim down the street, they received Mrs. Bradley’s irate report of a witch kidnapping Brittney. Not knowing Brittney was a dog, and not being able to get anything coherent from the irate Mrs. Bradley, Dispatch sent more units into the area looking for a kidnap suspect and victim while attempting to get more information. More 911 calls from the neighborhood came in as the Deputies continued running through the area searching for Kimberly.

By this time Kimberly had run back to her house, still giggling like a lunatic and still in possession of her kidnap victim. She reached inside the front door where the car keys were hanging on a peg, and two seconds later she was peeling off down the street in her and Dean’s semi new SUV, a look of wild glee on her face. The next 911 call was from Dean again, this one stating that someone had just stolen his car. The units that were already in the area looking for two males impersonating police officers and a kidnap suspect and victim, now began looking for a stolen vehicle as well. It wasn’t long before they found all of them.

One of the units cruising the neighborhood saw the two impersonators beating the bushes looking for Kimberly and lit them up with his spotlight. When he recognized them for who they were he pulled up and gave them a ride back to their cars. About this time, another Deputy radioed that he had located a vehicle matching the description of the stolen SUV, and that it was parked with someone in the driver’s seat. While other units converged, the Deputy approached the SUV. He noticed the motor was running and saw what appeared to be a young woman dressed as a witch and a little dog inside. He ordered the witch to turn off the motor and drop the keys out the driver’s side window. He was surprised when she turned to look at him with a big smile on her face, threw it in drive, and screeched away at high speed. The Deputy ran back to his car and radioed that he was now in pursuit of the stolen SUV. 911 calls from witnesses in the neighborhood began to flood Dispatch once again.

Kimberly was having the time of her life. She drove around in circles as patrol cars with pretty lights on top began stacking up behind her. Sometimes she would slam on the breaks to see if they were paying attention and then take off at high speed again to see if they could keep up. She thought about calling her husband to tell him she’d be home in a little while but her cell phone had fallen on the floor somewhere and she couldn’t find it.

After driving around for fifteen minutes she decided to go by the house and tell Dean she was fine so he wouldn’t worry. Running her fiftieth stop sign of the night she came to a screeching halt in front of her house where Dean, hearing the sirens, had come outside to see what was going on. She yelled “Hi honey, back in half an hour!” and waved as she drove off again with several Sheriff’s cars and three CHP units in chase.

The next fifteen minutes or so were taken up with Kimberly slamming on the breaks in front of her friend’s houses and yelling “Yeeehaw” before speeding away again and finally settling down to a seventy to eighty mile an hour run down Tuolumne Road toward Hwy 108. As the SUV approached Standard Road, a CHP unit deployed a spike strip causing three tires to go flat. The SUV continued toward Hwy 108 at speeds ranging from forty to fifty miles per hour slewing wildly into oncoming traffic lanes. More 911 calls came into Dispatch describing the hazardous situation that grew more dangerous as the tires started to shred. Sparks were flying in ten foot fan tails and the rims began to glow bright red as they scraped deep troughs in the blacktop.

The SUV turned West Bound on Hwy 108, spinning out in the intersection but regaining speed again. As the SUV neared a wide shoulder it suddenly pulled in and stopped.
Kimberly sat there smiling and refusing to unlock the doors. Eventually, in order to keep her from driving off again and endangering everyone on the road, Deputies broke out a window and unlocked the doors. Kimberly was taken into custody and laughed all the way to County Jail.

Brittney was found huddled on the floor below the back seat and the mystery of the kidnapping was finally put to rest. Brittney seemed relieved when a Deputy brought her back home, but as soon as she was back on her porch, her natural grit returned and she chased the Deputy all they way back to his car.